Couples Series: Affection Makes A Difference

Showing affection to your significant other can make a big difference in the satisfaction you both have in your relationship together. It is amazing how something as small as a touch or kind word can cause you both to feel more secure in your relationship, closer, and more passionate towards each other.

Its true, think about it, how much better do you feel about your relationship or towards your significant other when they show you affection, maybe grabbing and holding your hand while you’re walking through the mall. How would you feel if your spouse kissed you when you woke up in the morning? How would you feel if your spouse left you a note telling you how much they love and adore you? Good, I would think.

I know it makes me feel good knowing that my husband takes time out of his day to think about what he can do to make me feel more loved.

So, if you’re one of those people who says “I’m just not an affectionate person”. You must start changing the way you think about affection. Affection is important in a relationship because we all have a basic human desire and need to belong, be loved and accepted. Showing affection reiterates to the person you are with that you feel all those things towards them. Showing affection is not something that you are born with, most times it has to be cultivated, it has to be something you must do on purpose. Remember if your spouse does not get affection from you, they may end up looking or finding it in another place that is not you. They could replace their desire for affection with food, spending money and even (hopefully not) in an affair.

“But how can I be more affectionate towards my spouse”. Just start small, show your significant other that you appreciate them and love them. It doesn’t have to be something big.  The small things you do can sometimes mean  even more than the big things. You have to put thought into being affectionate, but the more you do it, the easier it will be. It might be a little wierd or akward at first but just start making an effort to purposely do one affectionate thing a day. This will help to jumpstart you being more affectionate in your relationship with your spouse.

Here are a few starter ideas of how to be more affectionate towards your spouse:

1. Buy them flowers, their favorite candy, gum, anything little is very thoughtful

2. Affection can be expressed in your words as well as deeds.

3. Kissing your spouse before you leave them and when you return.

4. Buying your spouse a card expressing your love for them, leaving them love notes around the house.

5. Cooking their favorite meal.

6. Showing affection is doing anything dedicated to making your spouse feel special and loved, be creative, there are so many things you can do.

So spice up your relationship by showing your spouse some extra affection. Need help bringing a spark back to your marriage or relationship, show some affection.

For more information on showing affection, here are a few sites to check out:

http://www.crosswalk.com/family/marriage/increase-the-affection-in-your-marriage-1363329.html

http://www.marriagemissions.com/100-ways-you-can-love-your-wife-her-way/

http://www.marriagemissions.com/100-ways-you-can-love-your-husband-his-way/

Any ideas on ways to be more affectionate, post them here. I’d love to hear them.

Baby Love

“Baby love, my baby love, I need you, oh how i need you”.

And I didn’t know how much I needed him until he got here. I’m head over heels in love with a miniature person who has beautiful eyes and soft skin. He’s honestly perfect and there’s nothing I would change about his tiny hands and itty bitty feet.

He’s amazing and a perfect gentleman, he laughs at all my jokes…ok, not all but most. He actually listens to what I’m saying and never judges me for what I say….of course, he can’t answer me and doesn’t speak perfect English, but that doesn’t matter. His smile makes my day and his well-being motivates me to do the impossible.

And I thank God everyday that he’s here on this earth and that God has trusted me and my husband enough to care for this child. Children are a gift from God and I’m more and more surprised as I see him grow right before my eyes.

So comment, what do you love about your baby or babies? What do they motivate you to do?

Perfectly Natural

Last year, I wrote a poem about my husband as he was about to leave for his first tour in Afghanistan. And I titled it “Perfectly Natural” because the feelings that I was having were natural, it’s perfectly natural for strong feelings to arise when a significant other is being deployed. You don’t have to be in or associated with the military to know what its like to miss someone you want to be physically close to. No matter who you are it’s hard being apart from the one you love. That year was difficult but I had school to keep me busy, but even then it was hard not to think about him and his life being on the line.  And now a year or so later we are in the same situation again, he’s gone and I am here without him but this time I’m not alone. This time God has seen fit to allow us to have a healthy baby boy to keep me company. Without God, without prayer, without family and friends I don’t know how I would have made it before and I know that those are the things that are going to keep me sane now. So with that I want to dedicate this poem to all those who have significant others in the military that are serving our country overseas. Be strong and God bless.

Now as it feels so right
I try to hold on to this moment in time,
knowing the disappointment of dead dreams,
hoping that death won’t ruin mine.
And I try to understand the dynamics of this love,
pulling pieces together one by one.
Knowing these pieces are intangible
cause physically grabbing them can’t be done.
And I desire to find evidence of our endurance
before it is actually forced to be shown.
And neither of us can know the future beforehand,
though we both claim to have it known.
All the limited moments we have now
move about us quickly with much haste.
As we both try to prove with every second
that our time together, we will not waste.
For now I speak my greatest fear,
although I purposely deny its existence.
‘Cause deep down inside I’m afraid
to acknowledge even my own dependence.
They say dependence leads to disappointment,
And being that vulnerable makes you weak.
But sometimes amidst our weaknesses,
we gain strength by being meek.
So I’ve said all this to try to express
how I truly feel about you, it was a must,
not worrying about other people’s opinion
because only you and I know about us.
Baby, I’m afraid to see you leave,
I really don’t want you to go.
But in whatever happens,
God will be with us, this I know.

Much love,

Ros

Welcome to Reflections!!!!!

Hi,

Thanks for visiting my blog. I really appreciate you taking the time out to come and see what Reflections is all about. Feel free to leave comments or email me at ros@worldwidewoman.org I would love to hear from you and I will definitely answer back.

Much love,

Ros